Wednesday, April 27, 2011

i am bad

Had ignored my both phones for such a long time, just taken a look and found three missed calls, all from parents, made 3 hours ago.... Not going to call back, they must had fallen asleep... Had forgotten the last time i heard their voice. In fact, i had never phoned them, it was always they were calling... Very weird that i always have nothing to talk with them, and each time they called, it only lasts for 2-3 minutes... Rarely having activities with them, movies, outings, shopping, vacations... Can hardly remember any of these that i had went together with them... rarely had any celebrations together with them, birthdays? father's & mother's days? anniversaries? can easily count the numbers of the celebrations we had together as it is really few... it had been like this throughout these years.. well, they are always busy, and i was not able to "organize" such activities at that time... maybe now i should really do something? i am a bad son huh?
Just knew from facebook, my brother is having a basketball game tomorrow... and the tournament had started for quite a long time... wow!!! really "early" for me to know it now... had been very late, not going to wish him good luck, in fact even if i knew it early, i am not going to wish him... i want to but really hard to speak out those words, even your own family, it felt so ~~~~~~, hmmm hard to describe... actually its a lot more easier to say such thing to a friend compare to family... my brother is 8 years younger than me, hardly have a common interest and topic at the same time. Furthermore, facing a boy at his age of rebellion really is challenging your temper. In fact, we don't have much interaction too, i hope we have more, even if it is an argument. hmmmm, i am a bad brother huh?

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