yea... i'm a freak

i'm a freak...
had realised that since i was a child,
as i had never been sociable in school,
as i always think differently from others,
act differently from them,
friends saw me in the same way,
and i had never found it shameful....
but life as a freak was never easy... :p

however after some time,
i started to consider myself as normal...
maybe i really had changed normal,
or maybe it was just my thought,
or maybe it was just a relative as there are freakier people around me...

recently,
found that i am a freak, again...
my thoughts, my stands, my favourites, my actions,
all seems so different from the others..

if the reason for a freak to be different is that,
he/she knows what is wrong and right,
and had realised that what usually people do,
or what people consider normal,
is actually wrong,
thus, resists to follow the others and act differently...
this freak is not just a freak, but a freak with wisdom and guidance,
or he/she should be named wise instead of freak...

if a freak acts as a freak for no reason,
he/she is just a freak,
another pity and lost person like the others,
just he/she had been living in his/her own world,
had not been able to get along with others...

suddenly felt so lost,
lost my guidance,
my priorities are not clear anymore,
not wiling to do anything, while there are so many important things for me to settle...

yea... i'm a freak